The Hills FINAL Season Episode 1 RECAP!

1.  Stephanie? AA?! Trouble child maybe?
2.  Stephanie has had MAJOR work on her face...
3.  LO, on the slick, is MESSY!...she talks A LOT!
4.  It was funny how Heidi was hiding her face while packing her bag to go home
5.  Heidi's boobs looked like they hurt, they were so high up & hard looking!
6.  Brody is HOTT!
7.  Heidi's mom looked TERRIFIED when she opened the door to see Heidi
8.  Heidi looked like a freakin' CAT!  There was NOTHING wrong with her face in the 1st place
9.  And then she said she wanted BIGGER boobs, but they wouldn't fit?! LoL...wooooow
10.  Mom' know best:  her own MOTHER said she didn't look good *smh*
11.  I would have LOVED to be with all of them in MIA for the Superbowl
12.  Brody wants Audrina; Kristin was PISSED a.k.a. JEALOUS!
13.  poor thing...Kristin tried to drink her pain away from the jealousy "let's take another shot!"
14.  Audrina looks SO much better BTW!
15.  That morning when Kristin woke up, she looked TRASHED! TOO and THROUGH!
16. And WHY did all of her friends that were in the bed with her scatter like roaches?! LMAO
17.  Heidi's "new face" actually makes her look older
18.  the dinner with Heidi & her family was SO awkward....it was uncomfortable
19.  Heidi's mom = SMARTASS!  That comment she made about putting the burger in the blender for Heidi because her jaw was still locked was HILARIOUS!
20.  And did you guys see Staci the bartender?!
21.  Kristin played the SHIT out of the girls (LO, Audrina, & Stephanie)
22.  And do you THINK the girls called Kristin out on enough problems?! DAMN! Kristin? a crackhead?!
23.  And why in the HELL would they talk SO BAD about Kristin while she was RIGHT in the next room?!
24.  and DAMN! Why were they interrogating Kristin like they were her freakin' parents?!
25.  And Stephanie has NO ROOM to talk about ANYONE having problems...
26.  Heidi's visit to her parents was so...COLD
27.  I think the girls were TOTALLY jealous of Kristin because SHE left them at the hotel and had an AWESOME time without them LoL!

Heidi?! Are those BOOBIES or BALLOONS?!

"The Hills" star, Mrs. Heidi Montag, showed off her "body work" for the 1st time at the Grand Opening of Liquid Pool Lounge at Aria Resort & Casino in Las Vegas...she looks UNCOMFORTABLE!

I mean her face reminds me of "The Cat Lady" LoL!

Let's recap what Mrs. Heidi had done:

1. mini brow lift 

2. Botox in her brow & frownline area 

3. nose job revision 

4. fat injections in cheeks 

5. nasolabial folds and lips

6. chin reduction

7. neck liposuction

8. her ears pinned back 

9. breast augmentation revision 

10. liposuction on her waist, hips and inner and outer thighs 

11. buttock augmentation

WHERE THEY DO THAT AT?!

I mean...what do y'all think?! I think she looked FINE the way she was before honestly!

Side Note: All good things must come to an end #sadface

The Hills FINAL SEASON (Season 6) premieres April 27th @ 10/9 CST

The Hills - MTV Shows - The Hills (Season 5) - MTV Shows

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is all that REALLY necessary?!?!?!

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ok, I can understand a clip here, a suck there, a tug over there...but OVER 10 procedures in ONE day?! That's OUT OF LINE!  Heidi Montag was ALWAYS a pretty girl to me before ALL that surgery, when she was on MTV's Laguna Beach, cute girl, and I LOVE and WANT her long hair so bad (I know, I know, I can go buy it, cause clearly it's not ALL hers, LoL) but I want it to look like that EVERYDAY! I guess that's what happens when you're a celebrity....get someone to do it for you EVERYDAY...lol

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fat injections in her cheeks...

nasolabial fold (nose job lol)...

lips...

mini eyebrow lift...

ears pinned back...

neck lipo...

chin reduction...

& the list goes ON!

The Hills Episode 8 RECAP

• Kristin & Brody go on a lunch date
• Kristin tells Brody that Jayde wants to meet up with her to discuss some things
• Brody tells her she's crazy if she meets with Jayde...cause Jayde is PSYCHO!
• Brody does mention that he still keeps in contact with her, but Kristin shrugs it off, she just wants him to be happy
• Heidi visits her therapist about Spencer not wanting babies
• like ANY human being, the therapist says they should have talked about this before marriage
• the therapist advises Heidi to wait on babies
• Heidi says she's going to stop taking her BC pills and SURPRISE Spencer with pregnancy...DUMB!
• Brody & his boys go chill and bring up the Jayde-Kristin fight @ the club
• they're ALL on Team Kristin .... YES!
• Brody tells them about the meeting that Jayde wants to have with Kristin
• Brody's boys think it's BAD NEWS...just a sneaky way for Jayde to get points with Brody
• that night, Kristin & Jayde meet up...Jayde is there first
• Jayde starts by wantintg to know what is the situation between Kristin & Brody?
• Kristin thinks that before Jayde tried to jump her in the club, she should've tried to talk to her 1st
• Jayde says that she DIDN'T attack Kristin (LIAR!)
• Jayde thinks that Kristin being around Brody is complicating her & Brody's relationship
• Kristin mentions that her and Brody have been friends for 5 years, and it was never a problem
• Jayde is not hearing anything that Kristin has to say & she says, "Go back to where u came from."
• Kristin, FED UP, calls Jayde a "bitch" & leaves out...leaving Jayde looking STU-PID, lmao!
• Kristin meets up with Lo, talks about the HORRIBLE meeting with her & Jayde
• Kristin says she DOES respect Jayde for meeting with her, unlike Audrina who stood her up
• Lo asks Kristin does she think Jayde & Brody will get back together? Kristin, w/ a smirk, says "NO"
• Heidi & Audrina meet up to talk about Heidi's HORRIBLE scheme against Spencer
• she mentions "I always get what I want" ...that's a DAMN SHAME!
• Brody & Jayde meet up for dinner to talk about her meeting with Kristin, they start off arguing
• Jayde wants Kristin to back off, but Brody says he can do whatever he wants, they're not dating
• Brody is frustrated, Jayde doesn't want to fight anymore, she misses him & wants to get back together
• Brody & Kristin meet up AGAIN and talk about his meeting with Jayde
• Krisitin's shocked when he says he might try to work things out with Jayde, she wishes him the best
• Kristin doesn't think that he's happy and he could be with a better girl HINT HINT
• Heidi has dinner ready for Spencer when he comes home, apologizing about pressuring for kids
• of course she can't wait for "dessert" LoL
• Stacie & Kristin talk about Kristin's dinner with Brody & how him & Jayde are getting back together
• Kristin plays a voicemails from Justin Bobby about him & Audrina being OVER & blah blah blah
• she doesn't know if she's going to call him back, she's just sick of the town & all the boys
• So, Stacie & Kristin pack their bags & head to Vegas...right then & there...I WISH!

TUNE IN TONIGHT for a NEW episode of THE HILLS @ 10/9 PM CST on MTV...WHOO-HOO!

The Hills Episode 7 RECAP

1. Kristin & Brody have dinner...Kristin asks about Brody & Jayde's situation, it's just a nice dinner
2. Heidi, even though she has the "kids" now (puppies) she STILL bugs Spencer about having kids
3. Spencer thought that the puppies would get her mind Heidi's mind off of having their own kids...NOT!
4. Heidi even asks Spencer "What if I get pregnant?" He sees her saying that as a threat
5. Stacie & Kristin talk about Kristin & Brody's date, Stacie says that Brody will ALWAYS have feelings for her pretty much
6. LIKE WE ALL THINK...DUH!
7. Brody & Kristin go vistit Brody's mom, she notices that they are spending ALOT of time togther, she even says they look CUTE together, and Brody & Kristin look dead AT each other
8. Spencer & his friend (forgot his name) go see a specialist about "turning off" his ability to make babies
9. he is CRAZY!
10. When the doctor say that the process is PERMANENT, he says OH NO and leaves
11. Kristin & Brody hit the club together, people notice that they are together like EVERYWHERE
12. so they ask each other..."What should they do?"
13. Kristin doesn't know, Brody asks what does Kristin want?
14. Jayde shows up @ the same club...and Brody is EXTREMELY surprised, HILARIOUS!
15. Jayde's friends amp her up to go and ask him "WTF is up?!"
16. Brody says he's just having drinks with friends, Kristin stands up & tells Jayde and her friends to leave
17. they get to tussling just around just a bit, little hand fights
18. Brody tells Jayde that's why they broke up, because she's psycho...so he says he out of there
19. Brody & Kristin leave TOGETHER making Jayde look like a complete DUMBASS!
20. next day...Brody is questioning him & Kristin going places together
21. Brody says there's no chance in hell of him & Jayde getting back together
22. Back @ the Pratt house...Enzo spills the beans about Spencer going to the doctor
23. Spencer tells Heidi about WHY he went to the doctor
24. Heidi is PISSED and doesn't like that he lied about such a serious thing
25. Heidi thinks that Spencer marrying her was the biggest mistake HE ever made if he doesn't want kids
26. Audrina & Justin meet up that night....he's lookin' just as good as he wans to look!
27. Audrina brings up Brody & Kristin coming to Heidi's party together
28. Justin Bobby brings up basically that Audrina doesn't know what she want with him
29. Justin Bobby said that Kristin did something different to him than what Audrina did
30. He said that he didn't have to think about what "Audrina would think"
31. Audrina just gets up and walks away

WOW!!! can't WAIT for the next episode, OmG!

The Hills Episode 6 RECAP

• Brody & Kristin talk about if they hooked up like NOW...what would it be like?! Brody jokes about her "divorcing" Justin Bobby first, LoL!
• Heidi whines about Spencer throwing her a birthday party @ their NEW house
• Audrina & Lo talk about EVERYTHING, and Lo asks what will Audrina do if Kristin & Justin Bobby are there @ the party, and they're all in the same room?!
• Justin Bobby & Kristin go on a date...Justin Bobby thinks that Audrina MIGHT try to befriend Kristin
• Justin Bobby is lookin' MIGHTY clean cut this season, I might add
• they both agree to ALWAYS tell the truth to each other as well
• Spencer & Heidi talk about the whole Brody, Kristin, & Justin Bobby, & Audrina thing...saying that maybe Kristin & Audrina should just finally talk
• Stephanie & Audrina ride to the party together and talk about MAYBE Audrina should tell Kristin about her & Justin Bobby meeting up on the rooftop
• Jade does NOT come to the party, Kristin & Brody come together
• Spencer gets Heidi puppies for her birthday IN a Louis V. dog carrying case!
• Brody tells Audrina about him & Jade having problems, and Audrina says that she thinks that Kristin is not the relationship type girl
• Kristin & Audrina "talk" and pretty much damn near TEAR each other's heads off, because Audrina tells Kristin about her & Justin Bobby meeting up, and Kristin tells Audrina that Justin Bobby said that she's CLEARLY not over him, it's HILARIOUS! They both don't give a F**K about each other and don't feel the need to even talk anymore, HA!
• Stacy & Kristin talk he next morning and Kristin thinks Justin Bobby is a TOTAL liar now and Kristin says she's DONE, and she's going to end it with Justin TODAY
• Stephanie, Lo, & Audrina meet up for lunch and talk about Kristin & Audrina's argument
• Lo is two-faced to me
• Kristin & Justin meet up and he wants to hear from HIS mouth what he thinks and what's going on
• He says he doesn't want all that mess in his life, with Audrina
• he asks Kristin what is her motive with him, and he hits her with some low blows, and she says she is DONE...wow, that was quick

The Hills Episode 5 RECAP

nothing BUT drama...I mean what did you expect?! LoL!

• Kristin & Stacie (the bartender) throw a beach party @ their house...EVERYONE is invited
• Brody & Jayde argue about Brody going, but he insists HE'S GOING!
• Back at the Pratt home, Heidi is babysitting little Enzo and Kristin' party comes up.  Heidi says that Holly is going, but she won't drink as much.  Spencer calls Holly's bluff, but Heidi thinks that Spencer is wrong about her sister.
• Holly is one of the first to arrive @ the party, she pours up a drink OF COURSE (Jack & Coke)
• Kristin gets a text from Justin Bobby: "Sorry Boo. Strike two. I'll call you later. She's fed up with it and Brody says that he'll get on Justin's ass (that's so cute & sweet of him)
• Meanwhile, Holly is having a party ALL by herself, loving life, DRUNK, and Stephanie pulls her aside to make sure that she's ok, and hasn't had to much to drink, and like a DRUNK Holly says she's fine when CLEARLY the whole party knows she's not, LoL!
• SURPRISINGLY Justin shows up, the text was a joke, he was playin' with Kristin all along, but she STILL didn't like it...Brody talks to Justin, all he can say is "Tough" HA!
• Jayde made a surprise visit to the house, didn't tell Brody, so he didn't like that...she said she didn't say anything to him when she got there because he was "too busy" talking to Kristin, WHATEVER
• At Audrina's, Lo comes over, Audrina tells Lo about her & Justin's talk on the rooftop...Lo insists that Justin is CLEARLY not over her.
• Kristin EMPHASIZES to Justin how mad she was about the trick text, he says well I made it, so let's just drop it, and Kristin says she just listens to what everyone says about him.  She told him that if he didn't show it, it was gonna be OVER
• Back in the house Jayde is crying because Brody sarcastically called her "Queen Jayde", so she's DOGGING him to her friends, Brody hears her, gives her a few words, and says "He's done" and storms out to the balcony
• The next morning Stacie jokes with Kristin about still liking Brody, and Kristin says that she WAS having more fun with Brody than Justin and "jokes" about dating him again (she knows she wants Brody back!)
• Heidi & Stephanie met with Holly @ The Pratt house to talk to her about her drinking, Holly is NOT having it, and she storms out of the house, AND flips the bird, LMAO!
• Back @ Brody's condo, Jayde is there...talking about the night at the party.  Brody says that Jayde embarrassed him at the party, but Jayde comes back saying that she thinks that Kristin still likes Brody, and she asks Brody does he still have feelings for her, and he says "he doesn't know" and that blows Jayde up.  She storms out telling him to call her when he figures out EXACTLY what he wants...OUCH, LoL!

Tune in next Tuesday to MTV @ 10/9 PM CST.....love The Hills!

The Hills Episode 4 RECAP

....because I forgot to recap Episode 3, LoL!
(I'm gonna do this the EASY way from now on, cool? COOL BEANS)

• Kristin goes home to Laguna to blow off some steam, and she tells her dad about Justin Bobby, and what type of guy he is...she tells the truth about him too, that he's not exactly Beaver Cleaver, LoL!
• After seeing Holly WASTED @ Brent Bolthouse's party, Heidi & Stephanie meet up to talk about it, and Stephanie states that Holly is like that when they always hang out...so Heidi & Spencer meet up with Holly to tell her about her drinking. She agrees that it's not a good look, and she will concentrate more on her career.
• Kristin goes to visit Brody @ his condo...simple talk about her intentions with Justin Bobby, he thinks that Kristin talking to Justin Bobby is sort of a revenge thing, but Kristin SWEARS it's not, and I BELIEVE her, LoL!
• on Episode 3, Justin Bobby stood up Kristin @ Brody's surprise birthday party that Jade threw for him...can you tell she's catching feelings?! Episode 4, he surprises her @ her Malibu beach house by cooking her dinner, he apologizes to her, and they disappear into the bedrooom for the night.
• on Episode 3, Audrina went on a date with her friend, that she met throught Justin Bobby, Mr. Derek (bad idea), Justin Bobby & Audrina meet up towards the end of Episode 4 on some restaurant rooftop to talk so that when they DO see each other around, it's not uncomfortable & awkward.  He gets REAL with her tells her like it is, it wasn't cool to go out with Derek, you'd hate if the tables were turned and I did it to you...SO TRUE!  He DOES tell Audrina that he cooked for Kristin and that it's nothing serious between them, just friends, and that's it. He does add that he will ALWAYS have feelings for Audrina and he will NEVER be able to say that ANYTHING was better than Audrina...DAAAAAAMN! but he also says, he doesn't want to stop Audrina from dating whoever she wants to, including Derek, HA!

Tune in next Tuesday, 10/9PM CST for some MORE...and that episode is gonna be GOOD, from what I saw on the preview...CAN'T WAIT!

The Hills Episode 2 RECAP

If you didn't know...Kristin Cavallari is the narrator for the shows now

Kristin TRIES to be the bigger woman & she invites Audrina to lunch so that they can talk & put everything out on the table, just straighten everything out...Audrina gets the text, & of course DOESN'T make the lunch date, which pissed me & Kristin off, LoL. She, like all of LC's friends, has the high- school image of Kristin in her head, "boyfriend stealer" "man-eater" & that is working my LAST nerves. Y'ALL ARE GROWN NOW...get off of that s**t & think for yourself! Build a bridge & get over it...cause Kristin sure has!

So anyways...

Stephanie visits Heidi & Spencers NON kid-proof (bachelor pad) home...

Kristin told Lo that Justin Bobby told her that him & Audrina were never EXCLUSIVE, they were never together...GASP!...So REVENGE is in order for Kristin since Audrina stood her up & she decides to "get with" Justin, "you mess with me, I mess with you" OOOOOOH!

Heidi & Spencer's neighbors drop by, with their nephew...EVERYONE is amused by the "cute little adorable boy", BUT SPENCER, & it's HILARIOUS! Heidi offers to baby-sit whenever they need her & she practically shoves that ANNOYING little boy down Spencer's throat, UgH! It's the most AWKWARD & ANNOYING situation/meeting EVER!

and to top it ALL off, the "Good Stuff"..Kristin & Justin Bobby show up @ club Playhouse TOGETHER & Justin Bobby has a baby-face, he cut that "mountain-man" beard ALL off, & he looks 10X better, OmG! In Brody's words, Kristin is "transforming" him! Jade, Brody's Playboy, slutty-looking girlfriend is there; to her friends about Kristin "I can't stand her!" OH SHUT-UP, the two dated in HIGH SCHOOL, my gosh! Kristin gives Justin Bobby a few compliments & what she thinks about him..HE LIKES

Back @ Smashbox Studios,Lo & Audrina are working @ the Vedera Showcase...BORING

Back @ Playhouse, Kristin & Justin Bobby get close on the dance floor, convo goes like this:

KRISTIN: if you f**k with me & my trust, I'll f**k you up!

JUSTIN BOBBY: I'm being honest, you can believe me OR believe what others say, it's whatever

AND THEN IT HAPPENS! Kristin & Justin Bobby kiss, & I'm talkin' about FULL-ON kiss...and EVERYONE sees them, Brody, Jade, her friends, & STEPHANIE (snitch) LoL!

THE NEXT DAY...

Heidi tests out motherhood by baby-sitting the neighbor's nephew, Enzo is his name (yes, like the shoe, LoL!) & in walks Spencer, who is pissed off might I add, HA! It's pretty much Team Spencer VS. Team Heidi & Enzo...Heidi teases Spencer on the slick, & Spencer's MEAN, NO HEART-HAVIN' A** has NO SHAME & unplugs the Wii WHILE Enzo is playing, I DIED LAUGHING!

Lesson learned here: Spencer wants NO kids, none WHATSOEVER!

Meanwhile, Stephanie & Audrina meet up for lunch, & Stephanie spills the beans about Justin Bobby & Kristin making out OF COURSE, & Audrina's dumbass is STILL trying to convince herself that this is a NEW Justin Bobby...NO sweetie, this is how he ALWAYS was, YOU just tried to change his a**, & that's why y'all are NOT together, damn, WAKE UP! he has not changed ONE BIT!

Last but NOT LEAST...Kristin & Justin Bobby get a bite to eat, talk over some things & figure out WHAT'S NEXT?! They don't care what ANYONE thinks & they just wanna have a"good time"...ALRIIIIIGHT ;-)

Until next episode Ladies & Gents....

pic courtesy Photobucket

The Hills Episode 1 RECAP

Ok, so there's no more LC...yes, we miss her, but I'M sure The Hills will be O-K without her, LoL! But, as stated yesterday, Ms. Cavallari is back, and from jump, things got exciting, and I LOVED IT!

Spencer & Heidi had a sort of "Welcome back from our Honeymoon" party and EVERYONE was invited of course. Well Kristin, being the social butterfly that she is, she spoke to everyone, and didn't give a damn about what you said about her, and she spoke to Justin Bobby (they met on the last episode at Spencer & Heidi's wedding) with a little twinkle in her eye, LoL! Well that just blew the top off of EVERYTHING! Stephanie & Audrina just GO OFF for NO reason! Just because they've heard things about Kristin, and her reputation of taking men, and blah, blah, blah, LoL! All she was doing was SPEAKING to Justin Bobby, damn!

So Stephanie & Audrina get REAL BOLD and go up to Kristin and they're telling her that she needs to stay away from Justin Bobby and how dare you? And all this CRAP, cause Justin Bobby has MOVED ON and Audrina CLEARLY thinks that NO ONE can date him.

First of all, Kristin is NOT FRIENDS with Audrina, so her talking to him, or trying to hook up with him is PERFECTLY fine, that does not break the "Friends dating other friend's boyfriends" rule. And Justin Bobby played Audrina to the left ANYWAYS by saying last night that him & Audrina were never even official....DAMN!

What worked my nerves was that Stephanie acted like Audrina couldn't speak for herself, and Kristin called her out on that too, I'm glad she did. Audrina is SCARY & Kristin will WHOOP HER ASS, and isn't afraid to do it, lmao!

That was the highlight of last night's episode, I SWEAR!

And then Spencer has this infatuation with this Cowboy look....cowboy boots & a Cowboy hat...HILARIOUS, lmao! and judging from the later episodes & the previews, he's going to CONTINUE wearing that mess, lmao!

OVERALL, The Hills is going to be nothing but DRAMA! DRAMA! DRAMA! this season...YES!